Chapter 4

* * *

I stood frozen in front of Gaeul’s door for quite some time.

Seeing her again made me happy, but at the same time, a strange fear crept in.

Throughout our marriage, Gaeul had always looked unhappy.

And I could understand why.

The long late-night conversations we once shared had vanished, and the time we spent together had grown shorter and shorter.

Our home was no longer warm.

Since I often had to travel overseas for work, the house in Korea became nothing more than a place for me to stop by and sleep. For Gaeul, it became a space filled with endless waiting.

I was always busy.

While I spent my days meeting countless people, in kitchens, in markets, or at meetings, she had waited alone in that empty house.

Even then, I selfishly believed she would be fine.

As I succeeded as a chef and gained wealth, our home grew bigger, our car became nicer, and expensive food and furniture filled our lives.

I thought that was the kind of happiness I could give her.

But aside from those things, I had been a terrible husband.

Gaeul had lost her smile because of me and spent many nights crying alone.

In the end, I hadn’t been able to protect her.

I didn’t know if I deserved to see her again.

I had no idea what to say first.

The memory of her tear-stained face the day she left me was still vivid in my mind.

“What are you doing there?”

A familiar voice came from behind me.

Startled, I almost dropped the cake box I was holding. Tightening my grip, I slowly turned around and saw Gaeul standing there.

Long straight hair, big eyes, fair skin like snow.

The empty look she had on the day she told me she wanted a divorce was nowhere to be found.

I stared at her, stunned by how beautiful she looked, before quickly pulling myself together and forcing an awkward smile.

“Hey.”

Instead of replying, Gaeul crossed her arms and gave me a disapproving look.

It was a habit she always had whenever something didn’t sit right with her.

Feeling guilty, I averted my eyes, but the more I tried to avoid her gaze, the sharper her expression became.

“Hey. When did you get discharged?”

“About a week ago?”

She let out a small, incredulous laugh and glared at me.

“A whole week and you didn’t even say a word to me? Do you know how long I’ve been waiting…”

Her voice trailed off as she pursed her lips, sulking. I couldn’t help the smile that tugged at my mouth.

Right. I’d forgotten, but Gaeul had always been the kind of person who couldn’t hide how she felt.

Over the years of our marriage, though, she had learned to bury her emotions little by little.

But the girl standing in front of me now was the Gaeul I used to know.

I swallowed my laugh and took a small step closer.

“You were waiting for me?”

“I was not…”

“Sorry. I got caught up in things and missed the chance to call.”

“…”

She glared at me without saying a word. I lifted the cake box, trying to lighten the mood.

“Want some cake?”

When she got upset, something sweet always made her feel better.

Whenever she was annoyed, I’d buy her desserts, though honestly, I mostly did it because her pouting face was adorable.

Her expression softened just a little at the mention of cake, and her eyes brightened.

She glanced at the box in my hands, pretending not to care as she asked,

“You think I’m that easy? That I’ll forgive you because of food? Isn’t that your mom’s birthday cake anyway?”

“You knew?”

“Of course I did.”

I suddenly remembered how, even when I had been too busy to call my parents on their birthdays, Gaeul had always taken care of it for me.

Even before our marriage, when I was away in the army or studying in France, she never forgot.

Remembering how she had done those things quietly, without expecting recognition, made guilt well up inside me again.

I awkwardly held the cake box out to her.

“I ended up with two cakes somehow. Mom told me to bring one to you. Since we ran into each other anyway, how about I stop by and say hi to your mom? I haven’t greeted her since getting discharged.”

“Right now?”

“Yeah, why not?”

She let out a deep sigh and shook her head. Then she tilted her chin toward me.

“Come on. You’ll need something to drink if you’re eating cake, right? Let’s grab something.”

“Ah, good point. Guess I wasn’t thinking ahead.”

As she walked ahead with a small, brisk step, I realized what this was really about.

She just wanted to spend a little more time with me.

So cute.

Watching her again, I made another silent promise to myself.

This time, I would make sure she never lost that bright, lively smile. I would never make her cry again.

I quickened my pace and caught up to her.

Then I gently took her bag from her shoulder and slung it over mine.

“Did you just get back from school?”

Gaeul was a student at Yeonseo University, majoring in Journalism and Broadcasting, and if I remembered correctly, the new semester had just started.

She glanced at her bag on my shoulder and smiled faintly.

“Yeah. Now that you mention it, weren’t you supposed to apply to school after your discharge?”

“I’m not going.”

“What?”

She blinked at me, her face frozen in confusion.

“Why? You wanted me to go?”

When I grinned and teased, her lips twitched for a moment before she quickly looked away and said,

“Why would it matter to me if you go or not?”

“Really? Then maybe I should go after all…”

“What, so you’ll go if I tell you to, and not go if I tell you not to?”

“Yeah.”

I nodded seriously, and she frowned, pretending to be annoyed.

“Then go, idiot.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Ugh, then why ask in the first place?”

Much later, after we started dating, she told me that she had actually been upset when I left for France right after my discharge.

Back then, I had been so focused on my passion for cooking that I didn’t even notice her disappointment.

This time, I wouldn’t make that mistake again. I would stay by her side and make sure she was happy.

But wait.

How did we even start dating in the first place?

I tried to remember, but no matter how hard I thought, the memory was blurry.

Maybe it was because it happened so long ago, or maybe because I had taken those precious moments for granted.

While I was lost in thought, Gaeul looked up at me with an annoyed face and muttered,

“You’re so irritating.”

I bent down slightly, lowering my voice playfully.

“But you still like me, right?”

“Did you not eat properly in the army or something? What’s wrong with you?”

She turned her head quickly and hurried into the convenience store.

But I saw it.

The tips of her ears were pink.

Standing outside the closed door, I smiled quietly to myself.

* * *

Inside the store, Gaeul walked past the drink section and began scanning the shelves.

Curious, I stepped beside her.

“What are you looking for?”

“Honey Butter Chips. Everyone’s been going crazy trying to find them lately. But I knew it. They’re sold out here too.”

I nodded slowly. So this was around that time.

The Honey Butter Chip craze had started in late 2014, taking the whole country by storm.

The sweet and salty flavor combination became such a sensation that the chips were sold out everywhere.

Even supermarkets had empty shelves where they used to be, and people who managed to buy a few bags sold them online at ridiculous prices.

A faint nostalgia stirred in me as I watched her disappointedly searching the shelves.

Then an idea popped into my head.

“I could make that for you.”

“Make Honey Butter Chips? You can do that?”

“Sure. I’ve had them before. I can probably recreate the flavor.”

Her eyes widened in excitement.

“Really? When?”

“When’s your free day?”

“I have a day off this Friday…”

“Then I’ll make it for you then.”

Her face lit up like a child’s. Seeing that bright, innocent smile made me smile too.

Whenever she laughed like that over something small, I felt happy just watching her.

After a moment, she seemed to notice me staring and quickly straightened her expression.

Then she glanced up and huffed,

“What are you staring at? Let’s go.”

“Your face is red.”

Her eyes widened, and she turned her head away in a fluster.

“It’s hot, that’s all.”

We left the store and soon arrived at her house.

As she opened the door, her mother, Shin Jung-hye, greeted us with a warm smile.

“Oh my, long time no see, Chani. Are you home on leave?”

“Hello, ma’am. No, I’ve been discharged now. It’s really been a while. How have you been?”

It truly had been a long time since I’d seen her.

Gaeul’s mother had always been kind to me, even when I was young.

Even after I married Gaeul, she treated me warmly.

She understood how unpredictable a chef’s schedule could be and often gave me advice or quiet encouragement.

She never complained, even when I missed appointments or came home late from work.

She had always shown understanding toward me.

But I had failed her too.

I had promised to make her daughter happy, and I ended up being the reason she cried the most.

Even so, she had never once blamed me.

Remembering that, guilt filled my chest.

She smiled kindly and said in her gentle voice,

“So you’re already discharged. That was fast. But how come you two came home together?”

Her playful eyes darted between us, teasing.

Gaeul’s face turned red instantly, and she waved her hands.

“We just ran into each other outside, that’s all. Really.”

“Oh, I see. But still, look at you, Chani. You’ve really changed. You look so much more mature now.”

“And you look even younger than before, ma’am. I could’ve mistaken you for Gaeul’s sister.”

“Goodness, listen to him. You’ve become quite the smooth talker. Come on in, both of you.”

I followed her inside, smiling sheepishly, while she laughed in delight.